The visitors had gone home. Their last wish had been easily fulfilled: they'd left without a word to anyone. Merlin was asleep, or at least unreachable. Which left Sasha the only person Arthur could ask to settle his muddled mind. Which was fine; she knew more of this truth than Merlin.
“Sasha, what was all of that?” Arthur asked her in private.
“Which part?” Sasha asked with an obvious desire not to say more than was needed.
“Can you really not use magic unless Merlin asks you?” Arthur clarified.
“Of course my friend. I thought you knew that.” Sasha paused and studied Arthur's stoic face. “But that's not what's troubling you, is it?”
“What magic was he asking you to use?” The King persisted.
“I believe Riker wanted me to avoid breaking his own cardinal rule by making you forget that whole conversation. He failed to realize that leaving such a big gap in your head would itself cause damage and irrevocable changes to this place.”
“Yeah if things are going to change, there better be an explanation for it.” Arthur reiterated.
“That's my thinking exactly. Besides, with one exception, I've never thought of using my powers that way, ever.” Sasha stated matter of factly.
“What exception?!” Arthur pressed.
“I never actually did it. But if Sir Leon hadn't taken the news well, and if it had happened any earlier than it did, I would have wiped it from his mind. Believe it or not, even though he's only known that particular secret for a couple of days, known it for sure I mean...” At that point she seemed to think she'd said too much and closed her mouth, but continued to stare King Arthur in the face.
“You think Sir Leon has um...had his suspicions...for some time?” Arthur asked bluntly.
“Yes sire.” Sasha stated in a tone to suggest she thought she was in trouble...or was about to be.
“What if I had figured it out. Or I couldn't handle it. Would you have taken the knowledge from me?”
“My king,” The young woman stated coolly. “I'm still trying to figure out how you learned the truth in the first place.” Arthur stared at her, open mouthed. “And the answer to your question is no.”
Arthur was quiet for a long time after this. Convinced she'd said something wrong, with no real clue as to what, Sasha remained seated and silent. Her original assertion about being in trouble was quickly confirmed as Arthur stood his highest and straightest and asked. “It wasn't your own secret was it?”
A ringing silence fell.
“I honestly need to know. I've known for ages you had magic so your secrecy made no sense to me.”
“You don't remember it?” Sasha pressed.
“Remember WHAT?” Arthur yelped.
“Okay forgive me but I have to be certain. What did you just figure out?”
“The only thing that would have you this mortified. Merlin has magic.”
“Okay, since we are now for the most part on the same page, let me fill in the blanks. And don't you dare interrupt me with more questions.” Sasha stated coldly. King Arthur simply nodded his head. “You did discover Merlin's secret. We thought you did. I've lived the past six weeks thinking you remembered that encounter. In which, by the way, you walked in on Merlin's mind to mind conversation with Sir Leon and took the news a little too well. But such a secret could never be that quickly or easily accepted. So together Merlin and I broke the illusion of those conversations. After the vision faded Merlin walked up to your room, flat out told you his secret and you told him to go to bed with as close to a 'mind at peace' as he could. I guess now the entire thing was someone pulling the wool over my and Merlin's eyes...the lie was not just the original vision.”
“So that's why Merlin's been more relaxed around me these past weeks?” Arthur concluded aloud.
“He thinks you've come to accept him for who and what he is...accepted why he does these things and what all he can do. It would naturally have put him at ease.”
Arthur started to turn away, toward the door. Sasha reached out her arm toward him. “Milord please rest on this a while before you do anything to Merlin. And when you do talk to him directly, please let him know I'm the one who messed up.”
The king stopped in his tracks and turned toward her. “I would think you'd want your part in this hidden.”
“Are you kidding me? The alternatives being Sir Leon really taking this badly or Commander Riker letting this slip? I'll take the blame for what I actually am responsible for.” Sasha answered briskly. “Besides, I hope I can help you to see why Merlin does what he does and that what he is, as far as being a sorcerer, is only a small part of the who of his being.”
Arthur sat down at the small table. “I'm listening.”
“I think the best way to show you this would be to literally show you the vision we both experienced. That way nothing is missing or clung to.”
“You said you couldn't do that anymore.” Arthur reminded me.
“In that case I'll tell it to you. And you had better be still and listen intently.” I answered him.
“He nodded and I began the story again.
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