A Beautiful Honor

Note for Context: Balian found his father's people without help. Imad's talk at the well was with a French knight, named Nicholas. Imad still calls himself 'Nassir'. And has sworn himself to follow Nicholas as a servant. 

One day, Almaric is heckling Nicholas in the street, just generally trying to provoke him to a fight. Almaric is perceptive enough to sense a fighter of some kind in Nicholas, a man at arms at the least and wants to see what he's made of. In that day and age it was considered just giving the guy a hard time. Getting almost no reaction Almaric quickly gives up. He turns to a Saracen who is standing nearby and starts hassling him much the same way; perceiving no connection between the two men. At which point Nicholas turns on him and yells in the sharp sort of voice which people hardly ever disobey.

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Heads turn slowly toward Nicholas. Who seems suddenly super-focused on Almaric. “You tried to get a rise out of me and were disappointed when I didn't join the game. So you turn around and hassle a complete stranger you think will be more easily goaded into fighting. I'm not sure whether to call that cowardice or Idiocy. Either way, your issue is with me so leave him out of it.”

Some of the words he used are strange to them, but his intention and meaning are clear enough.

“So you are capable of fighting after all? More than that, you are willing to. It is...a little surprising to be honest. After all, what is he to you that you stand up for him when you will not even stand up for yourself?”

“That's what I was doing sir, standing up for myself and standing my own ground. You tried to goad me into fighting and by refusing to join the match I stayed true to who I was. I can fight and I'm good at it. I just need a good enough reason to do so. You didn't give me one before. I kept my temper and held my tongue to avoid lowering myself to your level. Then you hassled a Friend of mine for no other reason than you thought he would be an easier target. What is quite a different story, and something I will fight you on.  I am fairly certain you will regret it quickly.”

Balian, who was standing nearby smiled at both his lefftenants mistake and Nicholas declaration of allegiance. A few on-lookers gave nods of approval at Nicholas reasoned argument, as well as his restraint at very subtly calling his antagonist an impulsive idiot. Nassir himself looked at Nicholas with awe and pride. Nassir was Nicholas servant. A freely given choice and a reality. It would have been enough to explain Nicholas' stake in the matter. After all any problem people had with Nassir would be Nicholas responsibility, as would keeping Nassir safe and free from harm. But Nicholas had risen to defend him declaring him his friend, not his servant at all.

Nicholas had already earned his appreciation and admiration, simply for being who he was and treating him with respect and consideration in private. He was quite sure he had never met a more compassionate and discerning Christian in his life. One who judged people for who they were, not thier title, position, religion or kingdom. A Christian lord who saw a Muslim commoner and treated him as an equal was amazing, and more than enough to endear him to the man. But all of that had been a truth between them. As far as the rest of the world was concerned, Nassir was his servant who also happened to be his friend and they didn't need to know anything else.

Or so Nassir had assumed until this moment. And now Nassir looked on his master, (a servant or a slave Nicholas was his master) with undisguised astonishment and honor.

Even so, Nasir kept an even voice as he stated. “You are so eager to fight you do not measure your enemy nor the field. If there is one thing I have learned about Nicholas it is how difficult it is to provoke him. And what it means when you do.”

“Nassir Please!” Nicholas snapped in Arabic.

“It seems this has gone on long enough, wouldn't you agree?” Balian said, stepping between them.

Nicholas, who had been reaching for his blade immediately dropped his hand. “I am sorry, mi-lord.” He began in a meek voice. “I did not realize...”

“I was talking to Almaric.” Balian replied, thoroughly astounded. “Believe me you did nothing wrong.”

“Neither did he. I honestly think it would be best if Nasir and I were simply on our way, please.”

At this point Almaric could not keep the look of shock off his face. Then again neither could anyone else who was paying attention.

“Are you, sincerely asking for permission to withdraw?” Balian inquired.

“No, mil-lord. I am suggesting that Nasir and I be the first ones to leave this...situation for lack of another word and then everyone goes back to minding their own business. Which would have been a good approach in the first place I don't mind saying.”

Almaric started to apologize, Nicholas held up his hand. “My friend was trying to suggest to you that maybe you should judge whether you can win a fight before trying to start one. I'm merely agreeing with him that this is very sound advice. When I got here I wanted nothing except to be left alone and at peace. With the exception of Nasir's company, I hold to that.”

“As you please.” Balian said with what looked like admiration in his eyes. Mixed perhaps with a little bit of envy.

“As for you mi-lord, forgive me that I do not ask your name. But I hope I might see you again and learn it...on more equal footing and at a more appropriate time.”

“As do I Monsieur. What did he call you, Nicholas?”

The man bowed his head deeply and, with a quick nod to his friend that basically indicated 'follow', turned and walked away.

“He taught himself French.” Almaric said in a low voice.

“I'm sorry, what?” Balian replied.

“That's why Nicholas sounds like that. So precise and yet almost archaic? He taught himself how to speak French.”

“Then barring him being a foreigner, and I don't think he sounded like one,” Almaric quickly shook his head in agreement. “he grew up alone. That's why he prefers being left alone. By the by, what do you think of our friend?"

"Milord?"

"Nicholas. What do you think of him and his Saracen companion?"

“I think if any man save you was going to put me in my place, I'm glad it was someone like him.”

Nicholas had refused to fight until Nasir was the one being threatened. Later Nasir walks into Nicholas private chambers, confused and uncertain, but determined to make sense of things.

Nassir: Why would you do that?

Nicholas: I'm used to people misjudging me. I've learned to chose my battles.

Nassir: No I mean, why would you call me your friend?

Nicolas: (caught off guard) Be-cause I consider you my friend. Seriously which of us is not understanding which of us right now?

Arabic to French: Hakim is Sage. 

Sayid is Seigneur or monsieur

almuayid is supporter advocate/second/subscriber like “I support your cause”

Nasir is Supporter champion/supporter/backer “I believe in you.” “I'm here for you.”

Nasir's true name is Imad al-Din. (pronounced Im-ad al deen) He calls himself Nasir because he has chosen to follow Nicholas.

Clark was unheroically wrong

 After Clark took over Lionel’s body in the early season 4 episode Transference, he was a truly changed man. No longer the near sociopath he once was. Then after becoming the emissary of Jor El, he became a true friend, ally, mentor and even somewhat of a father figure to Clark.

The Change in Lionel in the show was amazing. He took the exact opposite course as Lex. Lex started as someone who wanted to be good and for the most part was, but turned very bad. In part because of what he saw as Clark's betrayal and loss of faith in him.

Lionel started off the series as pure evil or at least unquestionably dangerous but become a truly good man by the end. How did you feel about Lionel’s transformation from enemy to ally?

I think Lionel's redemptive arc was one of the most beautiful, powerful and important parts of the whole series. I HATE that after all of that, Clark and his friend called Lionel a liar, Jor'el an idiot and dismissed him without a thought. So much so that Lionel died alone and friendless STILL protecting Clark's secret.

They only 'learned the truth about him' after he died. Or they only learned these last three years weren't a lie, after he died. At which point they -Clark and Chloe- acknowledge they had lost a friend and a loyal ally, but they never actually admit they were wrong about him, that they shouldn't have jumped to those conclusions/assumed the worst about him after everything he'd done for them. Lionel was on his knees PLEADING to Chloe to be heard. 'think what you will of me, you have to listen to this warning from Jor'el'. She dismissed him 'can't you find any new material'. Because he'd said basically the same thing at every series finale since learning Clark's Kryptonian name. And the only reason a small man like him was helping Clark was because it was the closest he could come to being with God. This comes after someone Lionel hired to keep Clark out of the way, disobeyed his instructions and kept him in a kryptonite lined cell. but even that man while he was there tormenting Clark cleared Lionel as not having the stomach for it and only doing it out of a misguided sense of humanity. And it turns out that not only was Lionel's redemptive arc, the changed man he had 'created' entirely genuine, but the reason Lionel was giving the same dire warnings they'd heard the last 3 years but far more intense was because all hell was breaking loose in a way it hadn't before. THAT is why he didn't care what they thought of him as long as they listened to his warning. 

And things that had already been going on that Lex has been involved with for months were placed solely at Lionel's feet for no particular reason except they had finally realized the truth about him. Lois and Jimmy were investigating this on their own, knowing nothing about Lionel at all. And these two sincere intrepid reporters found unquestionable proof that Lex, not Lionel was responsible. While never having condemned Lionel for anything, they had red faces for having assumed it was Lionel. And Chloe and Clark's faces were never even red from it. It actually kind of strained credulity a bit. And strained likability a lot. That all of the sudden Clark was so certain of what he knew. When Lionel went to Clark to try to explain he couldn't give a defense for the parts they had actually found out about, the things he had actually done including something when Clark would have been 8 years old. A part of the Luthor-Queen-Swann past. A group that had dedicated themselves as protectors for a savior from the stars and saw Kal-el as that savior. Or at least were waiting for him and the surviving members of thier group 'Veritas' are trying to fulfill their mission. They were the main bad guys of season 7. With Lex already being a super-dedicated villian but having no clue anything like this was going on. When Clark demanded of Lionel why he should still trust him 'after everything' (which I found that a painfully ironic question anyway) Lionel gave the only reply he could.

"Jor'el chose me, doesn't that mean I'm worth listening to?" 

 "I guess my father made a mistake." Clark replied coldly.

And he never took that back. Not even after Lionel died as a hero and an ally. Chloe and Clark never admitted e3ven to each-other that they had been wrong to judge him to quickly and they should have listened to him and to Jor-el's warnings. I found it infuriating that the man we were supposed to cheer for and believe in, the hero that more than anyone in the DC universe is the king of giving everyone second chances -- as Superman is no matter the variation and Clark Kent is known by this even more than his alter-ego. --  Never admits he was wrong. About one of his most dedicated allies. It's like the writers decided he all of a sudden has to be infallible in order for us as the audience to cheer for him...and can no longer admit he misjudged anyone. Because that would be too human. And not heroic enough.

After going through so much together they dismissed him out of hand. And certain things that were going on, that they assumed Lionel was doing behind there back turned out to be Lex's handiwork, which should have been obvious to anyone. Lionel had always been afraid of what Lex would do, he knew his son better than anyone. And by then Lex was the big bad in everyone's mind, especially Chloe and Clark's. So for the 'home team' to not only assume the worst about an ally but never actually admit fault or error sucks to watch. But these three years -Jor'el inhabiting him at the beginning of season five to Clark and Lionel actually embracing learning Lionel wasn't dead earlier in season 7 - were still beautiful.

Season 5 is worth sitting through just to see the transformation Lionel had undergone and try to guess what he transformed into. He was still enigmatic, Clark and Martha didn't really know what to make of him and neither did we as the audience. Near the end of season 5, after going through a game of hangman with a masked shadowy figure Lionel Luthor calls Clark by his Kryptonian name and admits he's known for over a year. It was truly a WOW moment! And the literal next thing I saw was Clark and Lionel embracing each-other in that very same room. Obviously time had passed. And I thought it could not have been more awesome. And as it turns out all of this...was about 5 episodes after that embrace.

Superman and Lois

Judged on its own merits - Taken in Context.

It isn't confirmed until the end of season 2 but this series takes place on another Earth in the multiverse. And at least 5 other Earths did survive Crisis. In the season 2 finale General Lane mentions that Clark ins the only Super-powered hero on this Earth. Meaning there is no native Flash either. They kept a general continuity of things that could be read either way. John Diggle's comment about fighting alongside Superman could have been possible on Earth Prime since post-Crisis they have always lived on the same Earth. This Earth's Oliver Queen did know them, as is as dead as ours. But there is no native Supergirl on this Earth, anymore than there was on Earth-1. You'd actually have to watch the last episode of Arrow to see why some Earth's merged and others didn't. Tal-Rho and General Anderson are original characters...but Tal-Rho is unique. General Anderson is a proxy for any human authority-figure who doesn't understand that Superman is anything but Superman.

Lana Lang Cushing is the single most annoying character in the show to me personally. So I won't waste time talking about her. The big thing is Superman can have kids. Traditionally Superman cannot procreate with humans. What we think of as Kryptonian physiology is incompatible with an Earth humans for making offspring. In the show Supergirl Lois and Clark could have a kid because they were on the asteroid of Argo City when Lois became pregnant. No yellow sun means no powers, no powers means Clark is essentially human and they can get pregnant. I bet a lot of people were wondering how Lois and Clark could have had kids if there was no mention they'd ever gone to Ago City. But it's never actually stated this rule is even a thing here. Maybe Generals Lane and Anderson wouldn't actually be surprised that Superman can biologically have kids. Anderson was just surprised that Superman had a human Life...at all. Ultimately this show draws that fine distinction between being part of the Arrowverse and being part of the multiverse. Diggle mentions having fought alongside Superman which actually still works because Team Arrow is almost completely self-made heroes without superpowers anyway. This is not Clark and Lois from Supergirl now living on Earth-prime. It's thier dopplegangers on one the very few Earths we KNOW survived Crisis. Earth 12, 19, 21, or Earth-9. Which explains Why Sam and Lucy Lane are such completely different characters from who we saw on Earth-38. Although again, the old world-new world differences could have explained that.

Almost everyone goes over the top in both drama and emotion in season 3. Far more real-world problems. Tension/dissension that feels like it's mostly there to make something of the production. Most of it actually NOT coming from Lana Cushing, but from practically everyone else.

Superman & Lois: Bizarros in a Bizarro World (2022) So many things at once all of it awesome

Okay Anderson gets way too much hate to begin with. A lot of that is either explained, excused, undone or repaired in this episode. Which is one of three reasons I freaking love it. One: it's inventive. Two it's probably as amazing for fans of the comics who know there are two backstories to Bizzaro in the first place as it is to fans of life-action Superman stories, who don't know the rest of the stuff too well. People probably found the going back and forth in the episode a little confusing but I loved it. Anderson had a hard time seeing Superman as anything but Superman and had gone over the edge a couple episodes earlier. Here he learned the truth about literally who he was fighting, that the multiverse even existed or at least that Bizzaro wasn't a clone of Superman but had a life and people he was fighting for. And his jaw was probably to the floor when he saw an Alice in Wonderland version of people he knew. We as the audience knew this was coming, knew what was going on had more of the story than Superman and were pretty blown away. Which is almost always a crowning achievement unto itself.
But also in one completely crushing moment Anderson saw that the solider he killed at Tal's fortress wasn't a monster, he was a family man. And that Superman himself, the Superman he knew and had mistrusted since day one, had a family and had a reason to play things so close to the vest, to put it mildly. He made things right with Superman and instead of getting home like Superman suggested/wanted he fought literally to the death, however out-matched he was. Personally I think a big part of why Superman could forgive him so easily is he realized that even if it was for a good reason, keeping Anderson in the dark about so many things could not have helped Anderson trust him. That maybe he should have extended some trust to the man... or at least let him know more of what was going on so the guy could make reasonable decisions.
Tal Rho was awesome. Seeing Bizzaro Tal Rho so close to his brother. Bizzaro had said he and his Tal Rho were the closest of brothers and we actually saw that relationship. Superman, obviously didn't. But He saw first hand what Tal Rho was willing to do to make it right. Whatever 'it' was.

Two Superhero Works of Art

Okay so these first entries will be taken from my Imdb reviews in that they are what I have written reviews about already and that is where the body of the text comes from. I think I have polished and renovated them to be more in my natural voice. The first is my review of Batman vs Superman: Dawn fo Justice. And the second is my review of the series Smallville as a whole. And the Legacy mentioned in the title is a Superman legacy, as well as a long journey.

Not Trash – a Masterpiece

The only convoluted parts of this movie are Lex Luthor's plan and why the world suddenly hates Superman. As far as Why Bruce is so relentlessly pursuing Superman and why 'Save Martha' actually pulls him back, they could not have set it up more clearly. And I realize a lot of Batman fans were disgusted/surprised at this version of Batman but they do explain his character perfectly: this is world weary, Robinless Joker beaten Batman who has almost given up on hope for the world. He spells out his motivations to Alfred "He has the power to make anything happen and if we believe there is even a 1% chance that he is our enemy He sees this alien as another freak in a costume. He even tells Superman while he's punching his face repeatedly "You were never a God, you were never even a man." Batman does not spare Superman because thier mother's share the same name. Batman didn't even know 'Martha' was Supes mother's name at first. But Superman asking Batman to save someone else was enough to make him pause and consider that this evil alien cares about people, cares about someone more than his own life. And then Lois comes in and tells him "It's his mother's name." And he realizes Superman has a human family. And literally everything that goes with that: he has a life, IS a good man I almost murdered. He finally realizes that "How many good guys are left, how many stayed that way" is a question he should have been asking about himself. Setting up both his mission and his attitude for the next movie.

Smallville An Innovative show that ran for 10 seasons and managed to stay cool

Some of the innovations of the show like red Kryptonite having a consistent physical reaction and his pod landing obscured by a meteor shower were pretty inspired. Season four with awesome writing and character development, just seemed a little awkward. And rushed. It's like they didn't know if the show would keep going so they pushed ahead like a steam truck until they realized they were being renewed for another season. So a transition where nothing happened that made everything else possible. Fortunately the show DID keep going because I LOVED Lionel Luthor's redemptive arc. When John Glover first came on as a recurring character he was a model of teh kind of man his son Lex was destined to become and also had athe effect of humanizing Lex to the audience. He was a true Machiavellian character that softened in season five and became a bit of a reclusive enigma. He also learned Clark's Kryptonian name and origin.

At first Clark was understandably reluctant to trust him but came to the conclusion that they did need him. After holding his hand to Lionel's throat in 2 different season finales, they became best friends. But halfway through season 7 because of the epically bad timing of a discovery from Lionel's past, something that happened before they even knew him much less from before he'd become an ally was enough to erase, in Clark's mind 3 years of Lionel being lock-step with him and dedicated to helping him. Twice before Clark had his hand at Lionel's throat, trying to kill and Lionel still came through for him. And they dismissed him our of hand as a liar and a false friend who finally showed his true colors. Turned out he wasn't responsible for the present day things they blamed him for. But they only learned that after he died. Also even though they mourned his sacrifice, they never actually admitted they'd been wrong about him, or how tragic it was that such a loyal friend died alone and friendless because they didn't believe in him anymore. Literally, he died protecting Clark's secret, murdered by his own son. The now full villian, manipulative and angry Lex Luthor.

Season 8 was horrible, contrived full of lies, betrayal and suspicions of infidelity. That is to say Jimmy Olsen, a friend of theirs they'd known for a couple of years who was always insecure around Clark thinking Chloe liked him better and would leave him in an instant if she could admit his feelings for him, started accusing Chloe of infidelity, was possessive and paranoid about how Chloe and Oliver Queen were spending thier time and eventually Divorced his now wife Chloe Sulivan for lying to him and 'being with someone else...keeping secrets from me'. I don't know anyone who would watch a Superhero show and want to see that. Most especially a show about Superman/Clark Kent. They actually killed him off at the end of the season. And while fans of the mythos probably hated that I think they made the right call. 

Season 10 was the other 'bad' season. That was because they were trying to fit every single bad guy from the DC animated universe in at once...into a show that was originally more about Clark Kent than Superman/Kal'el at all. These were bad guys Justice League fans would be very familiar with and love to see in live action. But Superman never faced alone. I never saw Justice League. I was never very familiar with any TEAMS of Superheroes. Only Batman, then spider-man, then Superman. So to me this felt like throwing everything in their but the kitchen sink. And no longer felt like a conclusion or the end of Smallville at all. Still pretty good stuff, but for the wrong audience.

To sum up, seasons 8 and 10 are the stupid ones.  Season 4 was weak. Season 5 which I forgot to talk about introduced the Fortress of Solitude, saw the beginning of Lex's descent into evil and gave us a version of Brainiac, calling himself the Brain-Interactive Construct. "I'm not one of them, I was only built by them." Season 9 was awesome for so many reasons, most of them having to do with developing and humanizing former loner, master archer Oliver Queen into a team player and devoted friend to Clark. It also expounded on the personal history and motivations of Jor'el as that was a powerful arc. The one thing I want to cure everyone from thinking is "The last 2 seasons sucked." Season 8 was the Olsen, Doomsday, Davis Bloom soap-opera disaster that had Oliver use kryptonite on Clark while he was actually in control of himself. And ended in Jimmy Olsen's death. Season 4 actually was a pretty weak season before the show hit its true stride and continued to grow past the "Clark in his high school years" theme. I mean season four WAS Clark's senior year of high school. Season 9 was everything fans of Batman or Superman would want. Oliver and Clarks relationship was that of a brotherhood and Oliver never doubted Clark again. It even had Julian Sands being Jor-el in the flesh and the most awesome dark and broody General Zod one could hope for. I'm glad I stuck it out even after the abysmal season 8. I'm sure you will be too. 

Post-it-note: The reason Justin Hartley joined the stage as Oliver Queen in season 6 is because Warner Brothers studio would not let Batman be used in a serial not expressly about Batman. And the friendship between him and Clark faithfully reflects the friendship between Batman And Superman in the various animated series and live action films.

Different Style, Easier Tone

 

There are a lot of things that I watch that when trying to write a review of the episode on IMDB it sounds off and far too much like a book report. Not because I'm so stiff in my writing but because an IMDB report is supposed to be more technical and have as much to do with what they did right or wrong, what they were skilled at even if I didn't like it. Also as far as writing reviews for episodes, I include things about other episodes or the arcs as a whole and then it's no longer about that single thing I'm reviewing.

But a bigger part of that is when I'm writing a review on IMDb, unless they click on my name, they don'[t know any other reviews I've written. they have no 'sample' for my writing or what I watch. Which leaves them with very little context or understanding for why I write the way I do or focus on what I focus on. So here on a  personal blog where everything is collected...and I am able to express more fully my connection and why something does or does not appeal to me, readers get a far more complete picture. As well as far greater statistical and emotional context.

So instead of copying what I write on IMDB I'll write reviews that were too involved or too esoteric to be written for IMDB in the first place.

A New Journey fo Heaven

 A New Journey to Heaven

Balian found his father's people. Imad's conversation at the well was with another French knight, named Nicholas. Imad still calls himself 'Nassir' and for whatever reason, has sworn himself to follow Nicholas. One day, Almaric is heckling Nicholas in the street, just generally trying to provoke him to a fight. Almaric is perceptive enough to sense a fighter of some kind in Nicholas, a man at arms at the least and wants to see what he's made of. It would be considered just giving the guy a hard time. Getting almost no reaction Almaric quickly gives up. He turns to a Saracen standing nearby and starts hassling him much the same way; perceiving absolutely NO connection between two men. At which point Nicholas turns on him and yells in the sharp sort of voice which people hardly ever disobey.

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Heads turned toward Nicholas. Who seemed suddenly super-focused on Almaric. “You tried to get a rise out of me and were disappointed when I didn't join the game. So you turn around and hassle a complete stranger you think will be more easily goaded into fighting? I'm not sure whether to call that cowardice or Idiocy. Either way, your issue is with me so leave him out of it.”

Some of the words he used are strange to them, but his intention and meaning are clear enough.

“So you are capable fo fighting after all? More than that, you are willing to. It is...a little surprising to be honest. After all, what is he to you that you stand up for him when you will not even stand up for yourself?”

“That's what I was doing sir. You tried to goad me into fighting and I stayed true to who I was. I can fight and I'm good at it. I just need a good enough reason to do so. You didn't give me one before. I kept my temper to avoid lowering myself to your level. Then you hassled a Friend of mine for no other reason than you thought he would be an easier target. That is quite a different story. THAT is something I will fight you on. And I am fairly certain you will regret it quickly.”

Balian, who was standing nearby smiled at both his lefftenants mistake and Nicholas declaration of allegiance. A few on-lookers gave nods of approval at Nicholas reasoned argument, as well as his restraint at very subtly calling his antagonist an impulsive idiot. Nassir himself however was completely floored.

Nassir was Nicholas servant, and that would have been enough to explain Nicholas protection of him. Nasir was Nicholas responsibility. The instant it was understood Nasir followed him in any manner the knight would be obligated to respond quickly and decisively. But Nicholas had risen to defend him declaring him his friend, not his servant at all.

In the weeks he had spent at the man's side Nicholas had never treated him with anything other than respect and consideration. But to hear his master, a man to whom he'd freely offered his allegiance declare him his friend was...unanticipated.

Even so, Nasir kept an even voice as he stated. “You are so eager to fight you do not measure your enemy nor the field. If there is one thing I have learned about Nicholas it is how difficult it is to provoke him. And what it means when you do.”

“Nassir Please!” Nicholas snapped in Arabic.

“Well, it seems this has gone on long enough, wouldn't you agree?” Balian said, stepping between the men. Nicholas, who had been reaching for his blade immediately dropped his hand. “I am sorry, mi-lord.” He began in a meek voice. “I did not realize...”

“I was talking to Almaric.” Balian replied, thoroughly astounded. “Believe me you did nothing wrong.”

“Neither did he. I honestly think it would be best if Nasir and I were simply on our way, please.”

At this point Almaric could not keep the look of shock off his face. Then again neither could anyone else who was paying attention.

“Are you, sincerely asking for permission to withdraw?” Balian inquired.

“No, mil-lord. I am suggesting that Nasir and I be the first ones to leave this...situation for lack of another word and then everyone goes back to minding their own business. Which would have been a good approach in the first place I don't mind saying.”

Almaric started to apologize, Nicholas held up his hand. “My friend was trying to suggest to you that maybe you should judge whether you can win a fight before trying to start one. I'm merely agreeing with him that this is very sound advice. When I got here I wanted nothing except to be left alone and at peace. With the exception of Nasir's company, I hold to that.”

“As you please.” Balian said with what looked like admiration in his eyes. Mixed perhaps with a little bit of envy.

“As for you milord, forgive me that I do not ask your name. But I hope I might see you again and learn it...on more equal footing at a more appropriate time.”

“As do I Monsieur. What did he call you, Nicholas?”

The man bowed his head deeply and with a quick nod to his friend that basically indicated 'follow' turned and walked away.

“He taught himself French.” Almaric said in a low voice.

“I'm sorry, what?”

“That's why Nicholas sounds like that. So precise and yet almost archaic? He taught himself how to speak French.”

“Then barring him being a foreigner, and I don't think he sounded like one,” Almaric quickly shook his head in agreement. “he grew up alone. That's why he prefers being left alone.”

“I swear if any man save you was going to put me in my place, I'm glad it was someone like him.”

Nicholas refused to fight until Nassir was the one being threatened. Later Nassir walks into Nicholas private chambers, confused and uncertain, trying to make sense of it

Nassir: Why would you do that?

Nicholas: I'm used to people misjudging me. I've learned to chose my battles.

Nassir: No I mean, why would you call me your friend?

Nicolas: (caught off guard) Be-cause I consider you my friend. Seriously which of us is not understanding which of us right now?

Arabic to French: 

Hakim is Sage. 

Sayid is Seigneur or monsieur

almuayid is supporter advocate/second/subscriber like “I support your cause”

Nasir is Supporter champion/supporter/follower  “I believe in you.” “I'm here for you.”

Nasir's true name is Imad al-Deen. He calls himself Nasir because he has chosen to follow Nicholas.

Songs for the People

                       Let me make the songs for the people, Songs for the old and young;

Songs to stir like a battle-cry Wherever they are sung.

Not for the clashing of sabres, For carnage nor for strife;

But songs to thrill the hearts of men With more abundant life.

Let me make the songs for the weary, Amid life’s fever and fret,

Till hearts shall relax their tension, And careworn brows forget.

Let me sing for little children, Before their footsteps stray,

Sweet anthems of love and duty, To float o’er life’s highway.

I would sing for the poor and aged, When shadows dim their sight;

Of the bright and restful mansions, Where there shall be no night. 

Our world, so worn and weary, Needs music, pure and strong,

To hush the jangle and discords Of sorrow, pain, and wrong.

 

Music to soothe all its sorrow, Till war and crime shall cease; 

And the hearts of men grown tender Girdle the world with peace.

Frances E.W. Harper.

PS Her poems are extra-special and enlightening when you realize she was a black woman who died before World War ONE even broke out

Starting from Nothingness

 At least, nothing that still exists. I checked.

“Sasha, why has it taken you this long to bring this up?” Was King Arthur's only reaction to his younger friend's suggestion, which she made promptly at breakfast the next day.

“I've never had this much of a reason to give Merlin a break from his duties and, honestly, I don't think you have either.” It was a not so veiled reference to Arthur's joke about Merlin's place at his side. But Arthur didn't seem to appreciate the reference.

“You mean this might help me out as much as it'll help explain things to Jayden?” He replied stiffly.

“I mean Riker will want to learn things from you just as Merlin wants to learn things from Jayden And the exchanges of information will be true exchanges.”

Jayden and Riker were seated at one of the longer tables with Percival and Sir Leon at the time. So they didn't hear any of this. When they saw Arthur bend his head in deep thought, then wave his hand to dismiss Merlin, they assumed the answer was in the affirmative. A few minutes later all five of them gathered in the great hall. Sasha suggested she, Riker and Arthur should ride out to a fork in the road to have their conversation, while Merlin and Jayden could go wherever they felt would suit their comfort and need. It was a n idea warmly supported by the others. Not two hours later the three riders departed, at an easy pace.

“I'm really not sure where to go from here.” Sasha mentioned once they were completely out of town.

“Really, you're the one who suggested it.” Arthur prodded.

“I know where I want to end up. I never...How did you actually GET to that split in the road when you and Merlin were following a horse?” Arthur's ears turned pink and he tried his best to hide it from his guest.

“I'm going to assume that's a private joke between the two of you.” Riker stated, as though in passing.

“I'll let that go for now.” Arthur eventually replied. “We have other business.”

Not thirty minutes later Arthur pulled his horse to a complete stop and invited his friends to do the same. “This is where the ambush happened. I'll assume that's what you referred to.”

“If I understand you at all correctly and am not missing anything, yes.” Sasha replied, almost testily. She walked up to the fire pit, propped the sticks she'd brought with her into a tall triangle and lit them with what Arthur took to be magic, but was really just a spark jug.

“Okay maybe you're not who I thought you were.” Riker intoned gently.

“I have three older sisters you know.” Sasha replied with a grin.

“Now I don't understand.” Arthur stated impatiently.

Without instruction all of them sat down for the long and messy conversation they all knew would follow. But let's see what Jayden and Merlin were up to. We can return to this place again later.

“Merlin I am confused by you.” Jayden admitted softly as they made their way to the north-most room in the entire castle, in other words, to Sasha's room.

“I can assure you the feeling is mutual.” Merlin answered in what was meant to be a casual voice.

“Where are we going?” The stranger continued, unabated.

“The only place in this whole city I know we won't be overheard.” Came the instant reply.

Once they were seated across the short table from each-other, so that the impromptu bed was on Merlin's left and Jayden's right, Merlin lost absolutely no time in posing the question that was on his mind.

“What are you sir?”

“Why do you believe I am anything but what you are?”

“I uh...I meant to ask your condition...your situation.” Merlin openly lied.

“I am Will Riker's equal and his friend. We are not equal in all things but...” Right about there the true meaning of Merlin's question dawned in his mind. “...I repeat my question.” Was all he said in response.

“I scanned the surface of your and Riker's minds. I couldn't see anything in yours except a desire to be understood and to understand. Commander Riker held these same concerns, but his admiration for our 'little world' nearly drowned them, as it were. Also you both must follow a very strict set of rules.”

“Little wonder Arthur seems to rely on you concerning visitors.” Data, as was his true name, interpreted, not bothering to remark on the proper use of Will Riker's rank.

“HE doesn't know I do it. For that matter, I don't usually use my gifts that way. You and Will behaved so oddly, not the least around Sasha herself, I wanted to learn for myself what could be the issue.”

“Why would you not tell your liege about your gifts?” The other man stated, bluntly curious. “For that matter, why is it such a secret?”

“I uh, I seriously don't understand your confusion.” Merlin admitted softly.

“We are not from this island. I had assumed this place...Camelot in particular...was blessed by magic.”

“Your assumption was very much incorrect.” Merlin near-laughed. “Magic is punishable by death in Camelot and under Arthur's father, that was usually the result. Because he learned what I am, Arthur has tried to be more tolerant of 'the old ways', but he still hasn't made it any less of a crime...not for good and all.”

“So, if I may ask, who already knows the truth? I would assume Sasha learned it somehow.”

“Sasha has always known, since the first time we actually met.” Merlin answered, now clearly laughing. “Sir Leon just found out a day or so ago and Arthur was told over six weeks ago.”

Jayden decided to take a moment to consider everything that had happened in his visit. After a long pause of thought, he stated in a defeated voice.“You have trusted me. I would be most unfair not to 'open up' to you.”

“I don't want you to say anything you are not comfortable sharing with me.” Merlin insisted.

“That is a part of it unto itself. I have no concept of comfort, or emotion or even taste. I may refer to Dr Soong as my father but it is a figure of speech...I am a constructed being. I do not know if I have a soul, so please do not ask. I have free will and I am not indebted to anyone except my captain. So much is...accepted.”

To Data's surprise and lasting confusion he found Merlin laughing again. For a moment, he was convinced he was being laughed at. And when Merlin had regained control he explained. “My friend as long as you can say with a straight face that you have a conscience and can understand loyalty I don't care what you are.”

“Both of which I can assure you, I do.” Data replied almost at once.

“I have to tell you though. According to Sasha I'm the most open, fair minded person in this kingdom. It's one of the reasons we are such great friends. I wouldn't risk letting anyone else know about this. You might get beheaded as a product of magic, or a souless monster.”

Data stared. “Forgive me but I have never been so easily accepted by someone who lived as you do.”

“What, in fear for their lives if anyone figured out the truth of their existence? Do you simply mean 'as primitive as this'.” A single look from Data answered his question quite completely. “In a twisted, round about sort of way, I've had a 'head's up' about your existence, and the reality of your construction. Just not about your coming here, or even that you could or would.”

“Please elaborate.” The android intoned.

“Do you really live on a ship in a sea of stars?” Merlin replied. Data did not verbally respond. “I'll take that as a yes. Captain Picard must rely on your fair judgment the way Arthur relies on mine.”

At that exact moment Will Riker was having a very similar conversation with his new friends. One that very nearly ended the same way.

“Grace, Sophia, and Elizabeth are my older sisters, but we all look so much alike to most people, we get confused with each other all the time. It has been my belief since Riker and Jayden showed up here that they know one of these sisters, and mistook me for her.”

“Grace visits us all the time.” Riker said plainly. “If you're not her, how did you know about Jayden?”

“Because I've learned to tell pretty fast if I can trust a person or what motivates them.” The young woman answered easily. “Most of what I've said about him falls under that category. And while I am not Grace, we share stories of our adventures with each other...in a very personal way. Also hearing you call him by his proper name, made everything else fall into place.”

“What 'proper name'?” Arthur insisted.

“Jayden is a name a group of villagers once gave my friend.” Riker answered at once. “His name as he himself chose it is 'Data'. It is simply another word for information or knowledge.”

“Who would choose that as their own identifier?” Arthur pondered aloud.

“At the time there was nothing about him he felt was more important for him.” Will answered in a harsh tone. “And his thirst for information and knowledge is very much one of his more defining qualities.” He turned from Arthur to Sasha. “You were right at that.”

“I said he's human in every way that matters. I never said he was actually flesh and blood.”

Riker seemed ready to faint at those words. “Why would you do that?” He inquired of Sasha. Who it seemed, did not understand the objection.

“Well he wasn't there at that statement I'll grant you, but it's perfectly true and relevant is it not?”

“I mean why would you destroy...Well I'm not even sure how to go about this.”

Right there Sasha saw the assumption. And decided to let her friend know she did not take the accusation well. Drawing herself to her full ramrod height, or as much as she could sitting down she stated. “William T. Riker, how in the name of sanity do you think you got here?” She checked herself a moment later. “I would think that knowledge unto itself would tell you I'M the one taking responsibility for this mess?”

“And she is not your friend Grace.” Arthur added as though his mouth were on automatic. “Although I must admit I don't entirely understand the issue at hand.”

Sasha took a deep breath to calm herself and turned to the king. “His people's curiosity got the better of them on so many occasions, they created this cardinal rule of not getting involved in other cultures. At least, unless external forces are responsible for the problem or some one in said culture made a direct request for help. He was certain it applied here and failed to consider his people had very little to do with what I've been telling you these past few days. And I have no such directive.”

Arthur looked uncertain. “Okay I'll accept that for now, but what does it mean 'how you got here'?”

Sasha almost hung her head. “That was actually my own missed perception. I don't know how they got here and had assumed something about it. I had also assumed that if I was right it somehow negated his directive. And no, I did not bring them here. Neither, I assume, did Grace. But I am grateful to see for myself the truth of a story I once told my young friend. I wonder if he's noticed that by now.”

“I hope we are at peace.” Riker stated calmly. “Jayden and I with you, Sasha as well as with the people of this kingdom. I would prefer to stay for a while and learn more of the truth surrounding your place hand your friends hereabout. I almost wish it wasn't already time to go home.”

“Sir, I hope you're not rushing out because of me?” Sasha offered.

“Or my own lack of manners.” Arthur added.

“It's nothing like that. We're on a tighter schedule than I let on before. It's time to head back to the ship, if not really head home.” Riker stated, somewhat sardonically.

Sasha looked surprisingly grim.“I sincerely wish you would be empowered and direct your own path. And do I assume correctly you would prefer to slip away practically unnoticed?” Riker nodded. “I think that's more than fine. As far as no pomp, circumstance or otherwise fanfare-y farewell. But do not vanish or disappear. Those you have met here would like, if not need the chance to say goodbye...yes? She insisted to Arthur, who nodded his assent. “Then on that part there is no issue.”

“Where IS there an issue?” Arthur and Riker stated simultaneously.

“I still feel like I'm scaring you off.” Sasha admitted glumly.

“And you haven't answered my original question.” Riker intoned.

“I assumed the question was nullified when you realized I wasn't Grace.” Sasha offered.

“Well the apparent contradiction was answered. I'd still like to know from you who you are to them?”

Sasha stood up and answered in a firm and quiet tone. “Until recently I was a constant visitor with a mask of happiness or dignity. Except to Merlin. He and I became close not so much because of that, as the fact that we both believed in equality, justice and the evidence of our own eyes. That friendship was only strengthened when I finally came to stay here for good and all.” Sasha's words seemed rehearsed and blank to Riker's ears. A fact which he quickly made public. Arthur nodded in agreement. The statement simply made Sasha grin.

“I've had time to come up with an answer for whenever this finally came to light. That is I was anticipating being able to stay here for good and all since I had two of four years of visiting under my belt. And I wasn't sure if these admissions would precipitate finding a place to call home, or if finding a place to call home would finally take down my guard enough to admit them. Arthur likes me because he knows I understand what I'm talking about...when I bother to speak up at all. To answer what I now know is a bigger part of your question: I've only for certain lived here for about eight weeks, maybe ten. I came here so often before, they could tell it was as much home to me as anywhere I've been. I'm their friend and defender against ignorance and true stupidity. I'm no more capable of physical combat than Grace was...and no less their friend than she was to you.”

A Merlin Flashback

“...Why do you call yourself Sasha?” Sir Leon asked of his friend.

She smiled at him from her couch.“Gwaine gave me that name, when I asked him for one. It means inner beauty. Why do you ask about that all over again?”

“That's actually not what I mean.” The knight admitted humbly. When you first came here you were calling yourself 'Nikita'. Why not keep that name?”

“Because as such Nikita was executed.” The young woman answered firmly. “Gaius, Uther, Arthur and Merlin all saw her through her last moments in this life, and she died. It was as close a call as I've ever made. She had to either die a natural death or face execution as a sorceress. And Uther let her pass naturally and in her cell. She came back to life, I came back to life. But I couldn't call myself by that same name.”

Sir Leon could barely believe what he was hearing.“Are you saying Uther knew about your magic all the times that you visited Camelot?”

Sasha smiled at him kindly. “Of course. She made him a promise and she kept it. As did he to her. He didn't live to see the day I finally could stay for good and all. Which is something he dearly wished could happen.” She took a deep, slow breath and took the plunge. “Sir Leon, I've been willing myself to live beyond my time since I stayed here. Now that you know what I'm waiting for, What are you?”

Sir Leon rushed to the court physician's chambers and pounded on the door. “Come in.” Was the simple reply from within the doors. When the solider had entered and quietly shut the door behind him he quickly saw that the young man, Merlin was the only one in the room. And that even though his head was in a book, his mind and heart were far away. For a moment he wished he hadn't come here with this suspicion in his heart. But there were too many questions that needed answers...and only one answer he knew for any of it.

“Is Gaius out?” Was the only thing the knight could think to say.

“He's with a patient, but I can fetch him if he's needed.” The servant answered simply.

“No that's alright.” Sir Leon replied hurriedly. “Actually I came to talk with you.”

A mild look of surprise crossed the pale face of the...whatever and whoever he was. “And you don't think Gaius should hear? I can think of only one thing that could have – well that could explain both this and the extreme distress on your face. I just hope I'm wrong.”

“Believe it or not Merlin, so do I.” A few seconds of silence passed.

“So, which of us will actually broach the subject?” Merlin intoned in a deadpan voice.

“I was seriously hoping you would.” The knight admitted gently.

“You think I'm a sorcerer and a liar.” Merlin offered plainly.

“Well, no. I don't think you're a liar.” Sir Leon responded softly. “But I think you have magic in your body and have used everything about who you are to fight that reality...or label.”

“We really should go to my room to discuss this further. Or I could try a useful bit of magic.” At first Sir Leon didn't seem able to comprehend the meaning behind this statement. The answer came completely unbidden, and straight to Sir Leon's mind.“I can simply tell you this way, but I don't think I can maintain it for long. And Gaius knows when I'm messing around like this.”

“...Then let's just go outside far from anywhere or anyone. I'll run interference with Arthur if he comes looking for you.”

“Actually, for as long as Sasha is ill I have a bit of free time from my normal duties. I know that Arthur understands how much she and I mean to each-other.” The knight fidgeted where he stood. “What's wrong? Surely you've seen that Sasha and I are dear to each-other...Or has someone besides me finally realized that she's not simply ill?”

“It's more that last part.” Leon admitted coolly. “I didn't know until about an hour ago that she was more than simply ill. And in the course of that conversation I learned almost as much about You as I did about her. She was about to tell me something that I'm sure would have answered a lot of the doubts and confusions I've had over the past few weeks. But she stopped herself, saying that you obviously trusted her judgment and thus she must trust yours. She left enough of an impression in my head that the only explanation I could think of for her sudden silence, but obvious yearning for openness, was that you had a secret to which she was privy, but could not bring yourself to mention to anyone else. And something else she told me, something she said would have happened, told me Arthur needed to know this but didn't yet.”

“Which was?” Merlin prompted.

“She would have sent Arthur to you with confirmed knowledge of your loyalty and trust. That is she would have told Arthur that much and he would have sought you out to confirm it. And somehow that would have prompted you to say something, particular. The trust and friendship you have would've been deepened.”

“And this was the only thing you could think of to fit that pattern.” Merlin breathed heavily. “Well now that you know you're right, what do you intend to do?”

“Find out from you whether you're more like Sasha or like Morgouse.” The knight responded simply. “Actually never mind. I know you're more like Sasha, because she has such unswerving loyalty and faith with you. My question is, why not tell Arthur what you are...and what your very life is proof of?”

“...Do you mean, that not all those with magic are enemies of this kingdom and that I'm more a servant than a sorcerer?” At the knight's nod, Merlin stood up, raised his left hand above his head, palm up. At the same time he dropped his right hand to near his waist, palm down. In one motion he brought them both eye-level and pushed them, palms out, in front of him.

“What just happened?” Sir Leon questioned with a small bit of wonder in his face.

“I've set a cloak of silence around this room, or at least around the two of us. We cannot be overheard or interrupted.” Merlin answered simply. “I will say plainly that you are both right and wrong. I am Arthur's servant, protector and friend. I don't use this reality to fight being a sorcerer. I use being a sorcerer to aid my mission to help Arthur. Now, what are you here to find out?”

“What you think would happen if you ever did admit your powers to Arthur.” Sir Leon replied at once. “And what all you can do and have been doing to help him in his quest for peace and unity.”

“First tell me what brought this to your attention.” Merlin declared.

“You saw through both the witch-finder and Morgouse. You were so reserved and secretive after Morganna came back that once she showed her true colors I had to believe you at least suspected the truth. But you've been a loyal servant and source of encouragement to Arthur this whole time...as far as I can see. But that's what I've recently noticed that led me to this conclusion. What brought this to my attention, made things so suddenly apparent was the knowledge and inference that Sasha wants you to TELL Arthur something; an admission, not a confrontation. In light of everything else, as I turned to leave a very quiet young woman to pass gently, I was pretty sure this was it.”

“Well I suppose that's just a matter of...What in the name of sanity is going on here?!” Merlin yelped.

“What do you mean my friend?' Sir Leon asked simply.

“I have it on fairly good authority that Gaius is the only one in this city who both can and would ever make a declaration like that about another soul. And I seriously doubt..” Merlin never finished that thought. “Do you think she's passing away right now?” He finished instead.

“She's weak, and growing more faint and lean. She can't even make her coffees anymore. I wouldn't be surprised if she passes within a day or two.” Sir Leon answered with blunt honesty.

“Then I need to end this talk and go up to her and keep as close a vigil as I can.”

“I thought you said you have leave from Arthur to stay by her side.” A confounded Leon responded.

“She doesn't want anyone, especially Merlin to see her this weak and weary.” The cold voice of King Arthur interjected. No one moved a muscle for several seconds.

“Merlin I think this will be a good time for me to get out of here.” Sir Leon suggested in a rushed voice. “With your leave Arthur?” He added. The king nodded and the knight bowed his head and departed.

“How long have you been standing there?” Merlin inquired, barely raising his eyes to Arthur's throat.

“Long enough to know that either the two of you were in a trance, or something stranger than that was going on. I pounded on the door but no one answered. I assume something was or is seriously wrong.”

“Something is definitely wrong Sire.” Merlin admitted in a solemn tone. “But not because of that trance. I am responsible for that.”

“Merlin you are confusing me.” The king stated, shaking his head and his short blonde locks with it.

“Mi-lord, I initiated that trance with Sir Leon. It was the best way I knew not to be overheard. I never considered it would make me blind to my surroundings.”

“You are learning magic?” Arthur's voice was more curious and puzzled than angry or troubled.

At least his friend heard it that way. “It goes deeper than that. I have magic in my very being. I just learnt... alright I can tell something is wrong beyond shock at this revelation.”

“Just, tell me plainly whatever is on your mind and heart.” The King stated firmly.

“I've always had magic in the fabric of my being. I'm living proof that not all wizards want destruction or death. I'm quite probably more of a coward than you ever thought of me...for keeping this from you.”

The young king starred at the even younger man. “Merlin, assuming you're not just pulling wool over my eyes or pulling my leg, I can never call you a coward again!”

“No one would be foolish enough to joke about this.” Merlin stated firmly. In a moment he pressed on. “And I hate to admit it but now you are confusing me.”

“To keep this a secret may have been cowardice Merlin, or self preservation. That doesn't really matter. What matters to me is what would have been needful for you to tell me to my face.”

“Um, clarify please.” Merlin intoned.

“I mean, for you to walk up to my chambers and flat out tell me this as an admission.”

Merlin fidgeted where he stood. “Well that's actually part of what Sir Leon and I were talking about.” He said joylessly. “He had a suspicion that I had magic. He said he knew I was more a friend and an ally to you than anyone else with magic he'd ever heard of. He said I was living proof that not all wizards want destruction or death. And wondered, that being the case, why I didn't flat out tell you. Right here and now I swear to you, if my oath means anything..”

“It does.” Arthur stated coolly.

“..that other than the simple reality that I didn't know if we could still be...as we are...after this revelation, I had NOTHING keeping me from showing you this openly.”

“And that is exactly why you are not a coward.” Arthur suggested blithely. “Well that and to stay with me under my father, and even after his death. Also admitting to this now is not cowardice unless it's being done out of fear. Which, IS that it?”

“Obligation yes, fear? Not really no.” Merlin replied simply. “I take it you also had a conversation with Sasha recently?” Merlin prodded with a slight smile on his face. His friend simply stared at him. “That's what brought Sir Leon here and I can think of nothing else that would have cooled your thoughts about sorcery.”

“Learning that even my father made an exception for Sasha might have had something to do with it?” Arthur answered in affirmation. “Learning that Sasha was staying silent about your secret not you about hers. That was the main event about it. There aren't very many secrets that would require such staunch adherence and resolve as what she's had for you.”

Merlin's smile grew, but a moment later he hung his head again. When his liege asked him about it, there was only one honest answer he could think of. “Actually Arthur, assuming I'm interpreting your words correctly I should say one thing. Sasha and I are friends because we both believe in hope, equality and the evidence of our eyes...not because we both have magic...Arthur whatever else you say or do to me, please know that I would ne-ver use my powers against you. I still claim and profess what tried to tell you all those years ago. I AM happy to be who and what I am...til the day I die.”

“He-he. Noted Merlin. But I think we should both go up to see Sasha through the last few moments or days of her life. And this time we will both listen to her final words.”

“Okay I can take a guess.” Merlin prompted as they turned to leave the room, side by side.

King Arthur smiled broadly at his friend. “Last time she was dying it was in a prison cell and she was still so careful with her words. Now we are both ready for this...and I think she knows she can speak openly.” He didn't say anything more until they were almost to Sasha's room. “Merlin, what did you expect from me?”

“I didn't have any specific expectations.” Merlin answered at once. “I mean I had rather assumed you'd be furious at a liar like me, if not at the fact that I was a sorcerer and everything that usually entailed. I had hoped to make one thing clear: I am who I am whether I can move things with my mind or not.”

“And what is that? I mean what and who do you see yourself as?” Arthur's question had come on the heels of Merlin's last response. For some reason, Merlin was having trouble finding an answer that fit.

“I...Some combination of a servant, a protector and a friend...I mean our history is more complicated than you knew, but I never lied to you about anything.”

“Except what you even were.” Arthur persisted.

At which point showed up in front of them. I could tell from Merlin's face that my face was either completely pink or pale as oatmeal. “I think he means that he is happy to be your servant til the day he dies. He's always told you to trust in yourself, to do what you believe is right not what your father or even either of us would have you do...though our opinion and your own usually went hand in hand. For his sake I'll not explain what four words convinced me of this. He has always put your well being ahead of his own...that wasn't a lie.”

I folded my hands as though in a prayer to indicate the story was over-with. Arthur sat there puzzled for a very short period of time. “What four words?” He asked me curtly.

“I should have expected that.” I told him simply. After a few seconds I answered him in a rush. “Merlin once told an evil sorcerer that he didn't want to lord his power over people, especially not over you. It was suggested that...well the four words were 'I don't want that'. As long as he keeps his heart as I've always seen it; a servant's heart and a loyal one, I'll follow him to the death. As he obviously would for you.”

“Alright, now I really am listening intently.” Arthur breathed.

The conversation lasted for hours. It was as close to an honest report on the question of what makes a person who they are as one would ever want to hear. It didn't detail anything Merlin had done with his magic to help Arthur, only what Merlin had told Arthur as an advisor: to trust in himself, in his own beliefs. It ended thus.

“Sire, there's one other thing that really needs saying. But I don't have Merlin's consent for it yet.”

“You really do follow him in all things don't you.” Arthur stated solemnly.

Sasha couldn't tell if this was a question, an assumption or a taunt. Assuming it wasn't the latter-most, she began. “I trust his judgment as devoutly and unswervingly as he trusts you, yes. But that's not my only reason for holding back. He needs to offer this knowledge and explanation...or it's just hearsay and slander.”

At what Sasha judged to be the most inconvenient time ever they heard Merlin's voice interject. “Arthur there you are what have you been...up to.”

At once Sasha stood up and stared her first friend in the face.“Merlin we are both in very deep trouble. And I was about to be in worse trouble than you are.”

“Then I showed up at exactly the right time.” Merlin stated firmly, but with a confidence he obviously did not feel. He looked his more easy going friend in the eyes with a serious question.

“Arthur didn't remember what we thought he knew.” Sasha stated unwavering. “I filled him in on the conversations we thought we'd had. Something else needs to be said even so. He needs to know something I...” Sasha looked sad and took a breath. “He needs to know what the Kalex and Aggrivane obviously knew.”

This statement seemed to be too much for Arthur's brain, and his patience. “What in the name of anything are you talking about? What's the Kalex...and what does my uncle have to do with anything?”

Merlin looked crestfallen. “The Kalex was a gate-keeper to the spirit world. I think she told Morganna about 'the one they call Emrys' and it became an obsession for her. To my understanding Morganna has never figured out that 'the most troublesome serving boy I've ever known' could be the one she was told to fear. Aggrivane figured it out moments before his treachery killed him. Almost everyone with magic knows...I AM Emrys.